This is a story of caftans and monsters and how monsters love to steal dreams of caftans.
Monsters exist, just ask Emma
We all know monsters that get in our heads and eat our dreams. Like “Baku,” the Japanese dream-eater monster. According to Seattle artist, Emma SanCartier, Baku mostly eats nightmares, but if you call on him too many times, he’ll eat your dreams as well!
If you think Baku is scary, you need to see the rest of her book!
She also creates fun figurines, many of which I own!
Emma knows
I received this book last Christmas because the people in my life know how I love whimsical art, especially local whimsical art. Since then, I’ve read it several times in order to acquaint myself with all the monsters. That way, when one shows up on my doorstep (or in my dreams!), I’m prepared.
Caftan Dreams
But how, you might ask, does that relate to caftans?
I had a dream for a caftan I created. A caftan called “Charlie.” And, although it is not a complete nightmare, it does not live up to my dreams.
In my dreams:
My caftan would make me feel like Elizabeth Taylor stretched across a divan, with a Maltese pup sleeping at my feet.
I would feel sophisticated and powerful, like Meryl Streep as Washington Post publisher Katherine Graham in the movie “The Post.”
It would be luxuriously soft, like cherubs dressed in goose down pajamas gently flicking their tiny wings against my skin.
The finished product would be a glorious sewing accomplishment and would prove I am a sewing rockstar!
I realize this GIF doesn’t have a caftan in it, but it does sum up how I hoped I’d feel after creating my Charlie caftan.
My caftan does none of those things.
Except for the fabric. The viscose linen fabric does feel like cherubs in goose down pajamas flicking their tiny wings against my skin.
Otherwise, I feel invisible. Like a black hole in a moonless sky.
And it’s not because Baku stole my dream.
It’s because I made a mistake.
Or, I should say, a series of mistakes.
First, I drove too fast toward what I thought I should make, based on what I thought others would like.
I convinced myself that dark blue is subtle and acceptable, sophisticated even. Originally, my eyes were drawn to wild patterns or color-blocking. I ignored those ideas, fearing I’d look silly and never wear it. Yet, as it is now, I won’t wear it.
In addition, I zoomed past the steps to tweak the fit. That dusty rose belt area would be much more at home right below the bust, giving the whole garment a bit of a visual lift. It might still be heavy because of the color and weight of the fabric, but visually, it would fit better with my body proportions.
After feeling so good about my sunset-colored Montevilla dress and my backless Bridgetown dress, I hit a creative wall going 100 mph. Not even the comfort of the dress makes me want to wear it.
Aspiring toward the Rockstars
If I was a teenager, I would have a poster on my wall of Sue from A Colourful Canvas. She is a sewing rockstar and I hope to sew like her one day.
Her Charlie caftan is the stuff of dreams. It just leaps out with joy and celebration and life!
When we spoke about her caftan, she said she doesn’t usually work in such bold prints. Yet, she took a leap and did it, and the results are truly gorgeous.
Sue also reminded me by email that these kinds of disappointments make the next projects better. All that time I spent on my Charlie caftan, all the money I spent on the fabric, that’s time and money spent on education. Plus, the money spent on the fabric isn’t a total waste. I can turn that fabric into something else that better suits it.
So, I’m not done with the Charlie Caftan. There is fabric out there with my name and Charlie’s name on it. One day, you will come here and read about my new favorite caftan that makes me feel like an elegant, sophisticated, powerful Elizabeth-Taylor-Meryl-Streep person with no Baku
Then I will feel like a real sewing rockstar!
I like your caftan and find it soothing, easy, and lounge-y. Sorry Charlie turned out not to be your type! I still applaud your creative gifts and willingness to experiment. That’s what it’s all about, my friend.
And your sneakers and shaggy blonde ‘do are fantastic. Liz T. has nothin’ on you. xox
Thank you, Patti! I’m hoping to pair my sneakers and shaggy ‘do with a caftan I like a lot better in the future. Meanwhile, this one will lounge in my closet until further notice.
Hugs,
Sherry
I’m sorry you put in so much work only to be unhappy with the finished product. Like Sue wrote it is all part of the creative process. That may in fact be a huge reason I’m not sewing my own clothes. I remember the feeling all too well in grace 8 Home Ec. I spent the entire semester making a wrap skirt which was unwearable in the end. It turned me off sewing forever. I’m glad you haven’t let one bad project spoil your love of sewing.
Suzanne
http://www.suzannecarillo.com
I probably would have given up when I was in 8th grade, too, Suzanne! In fact, I took Home Ec as well and sewed a pillow, but it took another 35 years for me to pick up the sewing needle! I didn’t have as much patience back then.
I’m don’t see what you see, Sherry. I like how this looks on you, but then, I’m not the one who has to wear it. Do what you’ve got to do. I’ve lost many a project to those monsters. Imagine what would come belching out of that beast were it slain, right? But we need the beasts to keep us going to do better (so I say wisely with a smirk). I would love to see this in that wild fabric though. And I love the sound of that book!!!
Ha ha ha! I love the idea of a beast belching out all the old ideas it convinced me were horrible. I do agree with you about monsters pushing us forward. This experience alone has me thinking about all sorts of ways to make the caftan work better and/or thinking about ways to turn it into something else. And if everything always turned out the way I wanted it to, imagine the hubris! No one would want to be around me!
You’d love the book! I’ll bring it next time I come up to Van City!
You see, for me this kaftan in this colour would be great. Like a blank canvas waiting to be painted. With this belt (great solution), with brooches, with fabric paint. Whatever.
You are good with fabric paint. Just saying.
Greetje
Thank you, Greetje! It’s funny that you mentioned fabric paint. I was looking at one idea for painting the caftan with bleach, but I haven’t settled on a design. I’m not sure if I’ll end up doing that, but it is fun to think about.
Oh Hi!
I AM feeling like a bit of a rockstar at the moment, LOL. Thank you so much for the feature!
You know I feel your pain…going through ALL the steps and ending up with a garment that just says ‘no’. But, it is, for me, an unavoidable part of the creative process. Gosh, when I think of all the ‘throwaway’ paintings I’ve painted…fully understanding that I learned something new, or simply got an energy outta my head and onto paper. Obvs…fabric is more expensive and we can’t help but want a garment we love…but I think we can still learn from sewing fails.
I’m not going to try and ‘make’ you love this…it’s weighing you down and I can see that. Shortening it might help, but it also looks as though you have enough fabric in there to consider remaking it into pants??? I will say to sit with it for a bit…I think your ah ha moment will come. And a little reminder…before you hack it up (if you go that route) do your pattern adjustments first. You can be messy with it…you aren’t going to wear it. So pin up the center panel to a point where you like it. I can tell by where the tie is sitting, that it is too low on you. It also looks like the shoulder seam is sliding to the back…so wear the caftan around a bit and take note if you are physically adjusting how it sits on you.
On a final note, I hope my critique doesn’t feel like I’m trashing your dress. It actually looks really beautiful! And well sewn! I do, however, understand that clothing has to feel right…something that only you can know.
xoxo
Thank you, Sue! I know you feel my pain. I keep thinking about what you said about certain fabrics and certain cuts of a garment just don’t work for you. I wonder if something similar is at play with this and would love to chat with you more about all of that.
I do think I’m going to try tweaking the caftan after I give it some distance from how I feel right now. As you said, what have I got to lose? And, if after all that and time goes by and I still don’t love it, I can make pants! (That’s actually what I was considering! That, and as I told Greetje, painting it with bleach somehow! ha ha!)
Your critique does not sound like you’re trashing the dress. It sounds like a kindred spirit who understands my woes and has some really solid ideas for how to give it a go. AND! You are a rockstar! 😀
Hugs!
– Sherry
Honestly, Sherry, I think Charlie doesn’t look bad a all, and neither do you wearing her. OK, she might not have turned out the dream of a caftan you wanted her to be, but still. But I can feel your disappointment and can relate to it, even if I can’t sew, apart from sewing on buttons. I often have an outfit in my head, in which in my imagination I look fabulous. I’d go as far as putting the items togehter, ready for wear. And then … disaster strikes, as the monster in the mirror tells me I look awful. But of course, it is worse for you since you have put all your creative energies in sewing Charlie. But you’ll have learned from the experience, at least. I’m loving the look of that monster book, by the way! xxx
Thank you, Ann! I’m sorry you’ve had similar disappointments. Those mirror monsters can be evil! On the other hand, the monster book really is a treasure. Her work is so beautiful and whimsical.
This has happened to me with knitting projects, so I feel your pain. I would suggest what Rhonda said first and experiment with it first. But it’s not wasted time…it’s a learning process either way.
XOXO
Jodie
Jodie, I have to tell you that I thought of you and your mom as I wrote this post. In fact, if I could have two posters of rockstar sewists on my wall, one would be Sue and the other would be your mom. And I’d have a poster of you too because you’re a rockstar knitter and just a cool person all the way around. 🙂
Thank you for feeling my pain about the Charlie. You’ve written about your disappointments with knitting projects, so I know you understand. As I told Rhonda, I’m going to give it a year before turning my caftan into something else. Maybe between now and then I’ll discover something about it I can love.
For what it’s worth, I did try sandals with my caftan. In fact, I tried on nearly every shoe in my closet before picking the Vans. I finally landed on them because they make me smile–they’re just so goofy in a way. And I needed to smile because, as you know, that disappointment is pretty heavy.
Sending hugs to all your crew, including your newest member! She fits right in!
– Sherry
Nooo! Don’t chop up Charlie – she’s beautiful and makes you look like a slim column of sophistication. You’ve given me caftan envy with this one.
If I could (humbly) suggest anything, it would be to ditch the sneakers and wear her with sandals and a bit of boho jewelry layered round the neck.
Sometimes our vision and the final product don’t match (I have a couple of 90 percent finished garments in my sewing pile that are making me sad), but that doesn’t mean the garment isn’t lovely. I bet if you wear this one you’re going to reap compliments.
Thank you, Rhonda for you truly kind rally for my Charlie caftan. Because of you, I promise not to cut it up and turn it into anything else for a year. Maybe that time will give me a chance to learn how to love it.
For what it’s worth, I did try it with sandals first but went with the Vans because even if they don’t actually go with what I’m wearing, they always make me smile. And I needed that because I was so disappointed.
What I’ve come to learn is that I am most disappointed in the color and the weight of the dress. It is *a lot* of dark blue and the fabric is somewhat heavy, even if it is super soft. (The pleats on the front give it even more weight.) I’ve about decided those two factors are the biggest problems I have…plus the placement of that front bodice piece…. But you read the post. You’ve heard all my tears about it.
All that to say thank you. You are very kind to share your thoughts and cheer me on. I promise not to do anything rash. 🙂
Hugs,
Sherry